My awesome vacation story....

As many of you know I just got back from a vacation to Los Angeles to see Universal Studios and the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. It was an amazing experience! But let's tell a proper story, shall we? It first started out with a plane ride. I've been on lots of planes in my day, but I haven't flown since right after 9/11 so it's been awhile. Things have changed a lot. They have those full body scanners now at the airport and you have to take off your shoes and such, then walk into this tube while you hold your hands up over your head. I honestly felt like Katniss Everdeen standing in the tube to rise up into the Hunger Games arena. But since I'm not a terrorist, I easily passed through the scanner and got my shit back and it was time to go wait for the plane.

The flight was uneventful and I must say California is one of the ugliest states ever from the air. Nothing but squares of farmland and hideously ugly mountains that look like camels backs. Not a tree in sight or any water or any houses or anything at all. Literally the most boring scenery out the window, which didn't stop me from staring out it the whole time. I'm not the best flier and used to really worry a lot that I'd crash. I just kept thinking I was on Lost and I looked at the other passengers wondering which ones might survive with me and be stranded on an island together. Which is crazy since there is no water nor islands in California, but this is how my brain works. We landed safely in Burbank and it was a mile walk to the car rental place. Then we got the car (a Dodge Dart) and headed off to the hotel.

I've never really used the GPS navigation in my phone because I literally never leave my tiny town so I don't need it. So it was my maiden voyage using it. It's really helpful! Damn. How the hell did I used to drive places that were unknown without this shit? I don't remember. But we made it to the hotel and it was awesome. We saw the shit holes that I'd seen on Priceline when I was booking rooms, and I'm so glad I picked the best hotel because the other ones were downright scary and still cost almost as much as the Hilton. I sprung an extra $200 to stay there instead of this flea bag, and it was well worth it. I don't even think hookers and crack heads would stay in the motel I originally booked. It was THAT bad. But the Hilton is fucking swanky and amazing and I felt like a celebrity. In fact the desk clerk guy was like, "You a big Harry Potter fan?" as he sees my Slytherin t-shirt. And I said yes, so he tells me to come stand over in this other spot and he's like, "That's where Rupert Grint was standing recently." I was like, "No way!" And he said, "way!" And explained how exciting it was for the cast of Harry Potter to stay at the hotel. Obviously he was a a fan too.

Unfortunately no one famous was around on my stay though. But our room was not ready when we got there, which was a huge bummer. I was tired and just wanted to check in. I had three different people all looking for a room to give us and nothing was ready so we had to wait. Then my mom, who is incredibly impatient, got it in her head to demand a fucking room. So she pesters the original guy again and is acting like we're big shots or something (which obviously we're not) and she managed to get us a room available. Don't ask me how she did it because I had no luck. But I think they gave us someone else's room because it was on the 18th floor and super nice. Down pillows and comforters and an amazing view of the park. Hogwarts was right in front of me and I was dying of anticipation to visit it. But we had to wait until the next day.

So we went to this place called the Universal City Walk, which is like a shopping and dining promenade. They have huge neon lights and it's like Time's Square or something. We ate dinner at Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. which was excellent. If you ever go there, eat the shrimp macaroni and cheese appetizer. YUMMMMMMY! And then we went shopping for stuff and spent money before even getting inside the park. But I saw some cool shit I wish I could have gotten. They had this 12 inch tall Severus Snape action figurine casting his patronus that I REALLY wanted. Except it was almost $300. A little too rich for my blood, so I passed. But it was awesome.

Then we went back to the hotel and I ordered wine from room service. I HAD to get room service because it's so much fun to do. And I ordered two glasses (my mom doesn't drink) and I pretended I was sharing the bottle when the guy came to open it and pour it for me. Then as soon as he left, I dumped glass number one into glass number two and drank the whole bottle myself. What? It's vacation! I slept pretty well that night and we got up early for the park the next day. We get there and it's packed, which surprised me since it's a Monday in October, but I guess it was Columbus Day. Boo. Who cares about that? But it made it more crowded. It didn't deter me. I tried to play it cool when we got inside and act like we could look at other shit, but I was dying to just run straight to  Harry Potter World. So that's almost what I did. I booked it past the rest of the shit and went straight to Hogsmeade.

Just seeing the sign made me want to jump up and down with delight. And then we entered the land of my people. The Potterheads. And it was brilliant. Such attention to detail in every shop window. All the employees were in Hogwarts robes with their house colors and there was Butterbeer carts everywhere and pumpkin juice and Gilly water, which I'm assuming is like Gilly weed. Either way, I had to get everything. I SO wanted to eat at the Three Broomsticks, but my mom didn't want to. So we didn't go in there :-( Same with Ollivanders wand shop. There was a line that lasted for an hour just to get in there, and 95% of the people were just little kids. I felt stupid wanting to get my own wand done, so I settled for an outdoor cart that sold just the wands of the characters. I HAD to get Snape's wand. And it was so cool and funny because I picked it out and then they escorted me to a spot behind the cart and had me hold the wand and wave it around and explained to me how I wasn't allowed to use unforgivable curses with it and I had to be careful the spells I did. I was in a good magic zone, and I needed to promise to heed that advice. I dutifully said I'd be good, so they gave me the wand. Well, they didn't GIVE it to me, I fucking paid a lot of money for it. But it was well worth it!

Then I HAD to ride the Forbidden Journey, which was inside Hogwarts castle. The wait time the first day was an hour and my mom was unable to ride with me, so she waited and I got in line and it was so fantastic inside the castle I was beside myself. Like other people were just like, "La-la-la, big deal...." and I was like, "OMFG this is amazing!!!" And I kept taking pictures and giggling and just looking at it all with wide eyed wonder. Talking portraits, the Fat Lady asking for passwords, the Mirror of Erised, House point meters (Gryffindor was winning dammit of course but Slytherin was second!) and then you entered Dumbledores office and there was this holographic video of him talking to us about the school. And then the next room had a hologram video of Harry, Ron and Hermione telling us about the important journey we had to take and what we had to do. We had to meet them in the Room of Requirement. Then you finally get to the ride itself and you have to run on a moving walkway to jump into the car.

Your legs are dangling free and they give you 3D glasses to wear and then you're off. It was such an incredible experience because it literally felt like you were flying a broom. We were flying around the castle and through the Quidditch pitch and Draco was there with Ron and Harry. And we flew and got chased by a dragon and then the Dementors showed up and Harry cast his patronus to save us. And I was laughing and screaming and cheering the entire ride. I was like a little kid honestly. Nothing has made me this happy in a long ass time. It was worth the hour long wait to me. There was so much stuff to see inside the castle during the wait, that it didn't even feel like a queue. It felt like part of the ride too.

Then there was another HP ride called Flight of the Hippogriff. It was a family friendly coaster that was really short and not near as exciting, but my mom could go on that one. We rode that the second day, three times. The wait was non-existent and one time they asked us if we wanted to just stay on and ride again, so we did. It was fun, but not as much as the other one. Unfortunately the LA Wizarding World is still fairly new so it's missing a lot of attractions and things that they have in Orlando, but it's still amazing. And I never thought I'd get to go. So I was like a kid in a candy store. Everyone was showing their house pride, people all had wands with them, and robes and t-shirts and hats and it was the biggest group of Potterheads I've ever seen in one place. It was like being with family, you know?

Of course there are other things to see at Universal. Fun things. We saw an animal show where they happened to have an owl from Harry Potter. Beautiful bird! And then lots of dogs and cats and guinea pigs and birds, etc. All animal actors. Then there was this special effects show. It was honestly kind of boring, but this creepy weird guy was hitting on my mom and kept trying to hold her hand and hug her and weird shit like that. And when it was over, we tried to get away from him fast, but he hugged us both and he's like, "you've got a great mother!" and I was like, "I know, thanks. Bye!!" and I literally almost ran away from him. Creeper! My mom was wigged out too. Then we saw him later and he's like wanting us to go on the Walking Dead tour with him or something and we're like, nope, and took off fast before he could catch up.

But speaking of the Walking Dead, that was a fun tour. It's not a ride, per say. It's a walking tour. But it's like the show and then real zombie people jump out and chase you and shit. It was SO scary! But I love being scared. I don't even watch the show and I loved the experience. It's like a really cool haunted house or something. Then we went on the studio backlot tour. They were filming some TV show I don't remember which, but there were hot sets everywhere and we had to be quiet during those parts. But then they have this 3D King Kong and Jurassic Park portion of the tour. The tour tram gets all knocked around and it looks like you're being attacked by dinosaurs and King Kong. They even spit water at you and stuff. It was a lot of fun.

Once the day wound down we went back to the hotel and decided to eat the buffet they had. Never again! I thought it'd be like $25 a person or something, but when I got the bill it was a $100 for two people! Holy shit! Back home you could get some seriously amazing food for half that price. If I had known how much it cost, I would have like taken prime rib and shoved it in my purse for later or something. It was the most expensive meal we had and it wasn't even that great. Then my mom went to bed and I went to the hotel lounge and drank overpriced Long Island Iced teas while everyone around me watched baseball. I was just on Facebook and trying to ignore the screams and hollering of everyone else because I hate baseball. Or sports in general. Except Quidditch! I'd cheer for that.

Anyways, the second day at the park was less awe inspiring only because I'd been there already. But I still wanted to spent most of my time in Hogsmeade and I rode the Forbidden Journey three times because the wait was only 10 minutes this time. And I bought WAY too many souvenirs and spent all my money, but it was so worth it. I wanted to get more, but I just couldn't. Not only was I running out of money, but it wouldn't fit in my suitcase! So I'm sorry no one got any souvenirs but I went way overboard, and then I bought my mom a Hogwarts jacket even though she doesn't even know a thing about Harry Potter. She really wanted it, so at least now she looks cool with it on.

Overall, the trip was spectacular. Everything was just like I dreamed it would be, and I wish I was still there! I know this is a long read, so thank you if you made it to the end. But I just wanted to share my experience with everyone. I never get to do fun things, so this was really meaningful to me. And I'm glad I got to share it with my mom. She took me on so many wonderful vacations when I was growing up, so I was happy to give her a vacation, on me, this time. I hope she had as much fun as I did. And I know I'll never forget it. If any of you out there get the chance to go to Universal and happen to be a Potterhead, you're in for a real treat! I can't wait to go again someday. A girl can dream...